I shared in a previous blog post that I want to share more about the parenthood journeys some folks have have experienced that I am lucky enough to photograph. I started by sharing our parenthood journey, which you can read about here. For so many reasons I am beyond grateful to share a part of The Brett family's parenthood journeybelow, along with images from their family session in the fall.
Tell us a little bit about your family.
Let’s see…. The Brett family. Simply speaking, we are a family of four. Originally, my husband, Darin and I hail from the east coast. Him, New York. Me, Pennsylvania. We’ve been here together in Arizona since 2009, so it’s where we call home now and where we’ve raised our daughters. Emmie is six and full of life. She’s one of those individuals that is persistent, inquisitive and a complete extrovert. She’ll tell you she loves hip hop dancing, lunch is her favorite school subject and that she’s a complete Pisces – she’s researched it and I’ve got to agree! Arlowe, our four-year old, is our sour patch kid. She’s just the sweetest thing and enjoys all those typical “girl” items – princesses, unicorns, fashion. But she can turn on a dime, (typically when she’s tired) …. and boy, that little fighter breaks out of her shell! That said, I love being a girl mom. I grew up with three brothers so being able to experience sisters is a dream come true.
Darin, my husband, is a graphic designer who also does some painting and mural work on the side, check him out here. I work at a local university with education students and probably like many full-time working moms, I’m often battling to maintain that good work/life balance.
In more typical times, you would find us traveling, hitting up the newest restaurant or attending a show at a local music venue. Since the pandemic, we find ourselves instead enjoying a myriad of “car coffees” as we call them, hiking one of the many desert trails Phoenix has to offer and holing up in our beloved mid-century modern home in Marlen Grove.
You had a benign brain tumor and had surgery to remove it in March 2019. What was that experience like?
Funny story. I’ve had migraines since age 7. Growing up and into adulthood, I would just randomly get them. There would be years where I would only get them once in a blue moon and other times where I’d get them much more often. Regardless, when I got them, they took me down. My friends and I used to joke that I probably had a brain tumor. So, while, initially shocking, being told I had one was also not all that surprising.
I went to the ENT because I kept feeling like I had something in my left ear – like it was clogged with wax or water or something. My hearing started to be a bit muffled. They did a hearing test and sent me for an MRI. I, very, distinctly, remember going back into the office to hear the results. It was one of those moments where as soon as the doctor walked in you just knew something was wrong. He told me I had a tumor and that it was “actually pretty large” and as I tried ever-so-hard to fight back tears one fell. And in that same moment he said “but you’ve got the best type of tumor, you’ll lose your hearing in that ear but you will be ok.” And long story short, I am. Sure, there were moments of terror, pity and anxiety. But I really committed to myself that I would take on a positive attitude and just truck through it.
So, in March 2019, instead of going to Disneyland as we had initially planned for my daughter’s 5th birthday, my husband and I traveled to San Diego where I had an 8-hour surgery to remove the sucker. That meant being away from my girls for two weeks while I recovered. Perhaps, the most difficult part was upon arriving back in Phoenix, my incision became infected and I had to have emergency surgery where my head was cut open for a second time. All those good spirits that came with being home and through it all faded as I had to go through a second round of being away from my family.
I don’t consider what I went through any more difficult than the next person’s story. I am beyond lucky for the amazing medical staff who were able to get the whole tumor without causing facial paralysis or one of the many other complications. I am beyond lucky for my very dear friends and family that rallied and took care of all my responsibilities when I couldn’t. I am beyond lucky to have two resilient little girls that rather than fearing the 24 staples in my head, wanted to show me off to all their friends! And I am ever-so thankful for it being a small blip, ultimately having no dire, long-term effects on my life.
What would you say to any other parents who might have to go through something similar to this?
Honestly, I think, as parents, having children gives us so much strength. When we go through struggles, we have so much to fight for. Of course, that doesn’t mean things won’t be hard – they will be.
Dig deep. Find that inner peace but also find that inner bad ass.
As you can probably tell, I, myself, am an open book. But I, also, am a lover of stories. Perhaps why my favorite types of book are biographies and memoirs. I welcome anyone that would like to reach out to share their story or ask questions to do so. I can be contacted at @theycallmegirl on IG or via email at juliannebrett@gmail.com.
If you could give parents one piece of advice, what would it be?
Much the same advice we share with students, I recommend for parents – strive for progress, not perfection. We’re all human. Let our children see that. This will help allow them to understand it’s ok to be human too. Mistakes are ok. Often, they are necessary. Reflect on your experiences and behavior. Talk about them. Build on them. Continue to grow day in and day out.
Thank you to the beautiful Brett Family for sharing your story <3
